Health Update

I wasn’t ready to write these words on the Internet back then. But I am now. And I want to. Not out of a prurient desire to share intimate details of my sex life – sorry to disappoint – but because I truly never believed it would be possible. I believed that lots of people could get better and heal from vulvodynia/ vaginismus; I just didn’t think I was one of them. And perhaps there’s someone out there who feels exactly the same, and needs to hear me testify to the change in my narrative.

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Alternatives to ‘Get Well Soon’

What should we say in the face of the knowledge that a loved one feels poorly? We don’t want them feeling that way for long, and we want them to know it – what else can we say? I took some time to compile a list of all the things you could say to spoonies instead.

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Diary of a Broken Vagina: My Mental Health

For World Mental Health Day, I’ve written about my experience of chronic pain & its effect on my mental health. CW: depression, anxiety, self-harm, suicidal ideation. Look after yourselves ❤

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Host

A poem about how pain can feel like it takes over your identity. Written in a flare. Any Spoonies who can relate, please make yourself known in the comments!

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The Letter I Never Sent

For two years, I had the privilege of dating a wonderful young man. This is the letter I wrote him but never sent – redrafted with added years of hindsight (which, as we all know, is 20/20). It’s about love, and remorse, and theft, and getting things totally, totally wrong.

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Useful Reads

Want to know more about chronic pelvic pain, self-help, and vaginas more generally? Of course you do. Here’s my entirely-not-definitive list of useful articles, books and even the odd video.

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Long Time, No Oversharing

As anyone with chronic pain will tell you, sometimes the huge effort it takes to do little things, like make a cup of tea or shower, really grinds you down. So when something big comes up, it can really knock you for six. Like, for example, having to make the significant decision to quit your Master’s degree because you’re not well enough to finish it.

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Warning: May Cause…

It’s like the worst Blind Date episode ever. I don’t want any one of the three mystery bachelor drugs, you can all get in the sea.

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